SATURDAY, DECEMBER 13, 2008 08:51 PM, EST
The memorial service was wonderful-thanks to Gina and the CP team and family members. Ray would be blown away by all the people who came. I was glad to put some faces on some names. I missed seeing alot of people who signed the book,but were unable to stay afterwards. Know it is a crucial time for the hotel industry. Everyday is a little better-but you never know what will set you off. I have been told it will get worst ,before it gets better-due to the holidays,his age and it happened so fast. As Stacie tells me ‘it sucks’and it does. We will head to St. Simons Island for x-mas. John has decorated inside and out. I am back at work and so are the boys. When I get sad ,I just think about the two wonderful sons that Ray gave me. They are great. They promised Ray that they would take care of me. John is working on finding Ray’s relatives on his Dads side and his mother , brother and sister. It will be great to have the family history. We have the tree up and decorated. there is a special Ray ornament this year. Thank you to everyone who helped us thru this journey-we could not have made it without you. Thank you for the cards and donations to caring bridge.Trying to figure out how to save the guest book- print or cd.Happy Holidays to everyone! Love, Julie,James and John
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 20, 2008 10:45 AM, EST
We are all doing very well. We were lucky to have Ray as long as we did. Melanoma is a terrible disease. We have lots of wonderful memories. A wonderful person told me that Ray is still with us- he just moved into our hearts. I really like him there. The CP team has been amazing-they are taking care of all the details for the memorial. I know the memorial will be as wonderful as they are. Ray will be so proud. Thank to Joan who convinced Ray to open this site-it was great for him and all of us. If you can, please join us tomorrow. Thank you for all the support,cards flowers fruit,lemons,oak tree and all the kind messages.Ray was truly loved! Love, Julie
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 17, 2008 08:00 PM, EST
Ray’s Memorial Service will be Friday at 11:00 am at the Crown Plaza Ravinia. We look forward to visiting with everyone afterwards at a reception in the Garden Room. We find comfort and strength in reading your messages every night. We truly appreciate all of you for being on this difficult journey with us. Love and thanks, Julie, James and John
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 2008 11:23 PM, EST
We had a wonderful day today with friends and family. We had 7 girls from the Crowne Plaza team. It was so nice for the boys to get to know some of the people that were so important in Ray’s life. We have named them ‘Ray’s Harem’ and it’s not hard to see why Ray loved his work. We needed to steal chairs from all the rooms on the hall to fit everyone in and we loved doing it. We received cookies, pumpkin bread, muffins,cheese crackers, apples, flowers, plants and a delicious bar-b-que dinner. Thanks so much to Stacie B, Stacie D, Gena, Jen,Brenda, Deanna, Linda and Julie and David B. It was a wonderful last day for Ray. We all know he is pain free and cancer free in Heaven. God Bless you for all of your prayers, love and kindness throughout this journey. Ray, Julie, James, John and Cyndy(Julie’s sister)
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 15, 2008 12:37 AM, EST
Hi,everyone, I just arrived tonight and this place is lovely. It feels like a beautiful private home, with living rooms, a library, fireplaces and Starbucks coffee just for Ray. Julie and I just read Ray all of his Caring Bridge messages for today and he really appreciates all of the beautiful things you all have to say. There are some great memories from days gone by in today’s entries. It’s wonderful seeing Julie, Ray and the boys. The trip here was another wonderful adventure in air travel, delayed flights, holding patterns over Montgomery, and 20 minutes to taxi to the terminal with big jets taking off and landing on top of us in a pea soup fog! I asked Ray how he did it for so long. But it’s very nice to be here. Keep the wonderful messages and memories coming, Ray loves to hear them.Love, Cyndy
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 13, 2008 12:43 PM, EST
Yesterday was not a good day,visiting nurse came by and off we went to Hospice Atlanta-look it up on line .A wonderful facility,with wonderful people. Ray is finallly resting and sleeping. The CP team found a room at the Staybridge for us,so we can be close.Thank you! I will be staying with Ray, so the boys will enjoy the hotel. John left yesterday and will be back tonight. Ray has a great room with a french door to a patio -waterfall,bridge and lots of empty bird feeders. James will take care of that after work. Ray loved feeding and watching our birds. Everyone of you have been so wonderful through out this journey-we couldn’t have made it with out all of you. I know Ray is proud of all of you and loved being part of the team. Thank you for letting us be part of IHG. Challenging times are ahead,but I know you will conquer the hotel world. I’ll keep you informed how the Best father and husband in the world is doing. Love,Julie
TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 11, 2008 12:16 AM, EST
It,s a cool 60 degrees- beautiful day,Ray is snoring away. It was an active nite-I’m going to crawl in with him shortly for a nap. Home health care comes today.We finally got the wheel chair at 9:00pm last nite-the office chair just didn’t do it. The brain swelling from the radiation has caused weakness in his legs,disorietation at times and pain. We are working hard on it. James and John have been working from home,so they are helping Ray and cooking and juicing for him. It is wonderful having both of them home-the best thing Ray and I ever did. They are sooooo intelligent-didn’t get it from me. . We have a big Thanksgiving planned-my sister Cyndy and her hubby Jock are coming.The boys love to cook. We have been invited to dinner by a friend who has a LARGE family-they celebrate at the farm. We will go for dessert and coffee. Looking forward to seeing the farm.Thanks to everyone who has sent gifts to Ray-edible arrangements,meyer lemons,plants’,cards, e-mails,gift cards,tote bags,pens,flowers, books, tapes,and love and kindness. One day you will get a thank you note- mother is not happy with me! Ya’ll (as we say in the south) have been Wonderful!Friday as we were coming home from the office-Ray was in pain-so as the moans got louder,my foot got heavier-the pedal was on the metal.Ray spots the cop as I go whizzing by-only to be pulled over- I tuned to Ray and told him ,he better really moan loudly. The cop informed me I was doing 82 in a 55 on 400. Ray moaned andI told him I was trying to get him home-turned on the tears and he asked me to slow down. Ray was amazed! Next entry I tell you about the leaky potty chair. Plug for Jock-he just published his first book’Natalie Scott’-really great book. Love to all,Julie and Ray
SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 09, 2008 09:25 PM, EST
Friday, we went to the office for a meeting and the Thanksgiving pot luck-it was great.Still waiting for some receipes. Ray was in pain all day- we just couldn’t get it under control until that afternoon. Ray has taken a medical leave from work,so you can e-mail him at-juliaeshepard@yahoo.com or write here. We had a great B-day party today-thanks for all the cards and wishes. John and James were a great help-Ray loves having them around. Ptc has just been full of color-just fabulous. hopefully it will be warmer tomorrow so we can go for a golf cart tour of the trees. We have our first deer in the yard and lots of leaves.Anyone who likes to rake is welcome anytime . Will set up a new Email for Ray. Long day heading to bed. Julie
THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 06, 2008 06:37 AM, EST
We saw the doctor yesterday-we will continue the temodar on the 17th. It is an easy pill-so we have high hopes that this is the miracle pill to go with all the prayers and well wishes. We changed some pain pills and found a new cream for his hand-so far GREAT! Ray looks very stately with his walnut cane-still learning his current limitations. He has his presentation this am.We will depart for home at 12:00-John wanted to cook dinner before he leaves tonight. I’m off to william-sonoma from 2-6.THe dr. wants to do an MRI on the spine -too much radiation-will see. Everybody keep up the great work-we feel it.Love,Julie
SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 02, 2008 11:32 PM, EST
SORRY THE UPDATE IS UNDER FRIDAY OCT.31ST-I DIDN’T CHANGE THE DATE. JULIE
SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 02, 2008 09:41 PM, EST
Ray had a good day. John stayed over and we went to ted’s montana grill for the blue plate special-turkey and dressing, green beans and mashed potatoes. He enjoyed getting out. We will go to Emory on tuesday for labs and then to powers ferry for the meeting. I’ll be driving this week. The e-mails should be flowing monday am. Sorry I wasn’t clear-we didn’t stay in the hospital-we came home.It was out local hospital and they were great. Rays’ first ambulance ride. We know with all this support we will have him strong again soon. Julie
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 01, 2008 09:36 PM, EDT
Seizure. Heading to Hospital.
-JRS
SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 01, 2008 08:24 PM, EDT
Well that was Sunday and he last of the good days. Ray was out of it-nausea,vomiting,fatigue and fuzzy brain and terrible pain. We kept checking with Emory-found out about a pain breakthru med we could use.that helped.He couldn’t keep anything down and couldn’t sleep. Ray gets extremely frustrated when he can’t work.He was a joy to be with-finally friday at 2pm,I called Emory and we headed in for a MRI of the brain.As usual we get the rare effects rather than the good results-swelling on the brain from the radiation,which was causing all the symptoms. – Julie
FRIDAY, OCTOBER 31, 2008 11:05 PM, CDT
I didn’t realize that James signed off my journal and added his. I was writing when it happened. Ray is up this am. eating and talking on the phone.He is on meds. that will prevent seizures. The ER said he should have been on them. John our 23yr.old was in town from st.simons island and James our 25 yr old lives with us-so everyone was at the hospital. I won’t let James move out! It was great having them here-they adore their Dad. Thanks for all the prayers and well wishes-keep them coming! I was allowing Ray to get off the carrot juice-today I’m going to give it to him in an IV if necessary. I hope you all understand-I don’t type-I’am the generation that was told if you typed you would be a typist. Yes!I am older than Ray- rocking the cradle! Everyone is invited to Ray’s birthday party on Sunday, Nov.9TH 3:00.Yes we will have cake and ice cream-You know how he loves to hide his b-day. He will be 56. He is definitely feeling better- he asked for choc.chip cookies-old habits are hard to break.Julie
SUNDAY, OCTOBER 26, 2008 07:38 PM, EDT
It’s been 2 weeks since I have writen, my apologies. Work has been very busy, a great deal happening and I’m excited.
Healthwise, things have been great! Started and completed my chemo pill this pass week. The only hick-up was when I took my streroid pill mid-day. The combination of the two made me woosy, but that lasted only about 2 hours and and then I started feeling quite good the rest of the day. Now about my steroid pill.
I FINALLY learned what was going to help my arm and hand pain…..steroids. i had a choice between a shot or pills. I choose pills for 6 days, and I started thm at the same time as my chemo pills. Maybe a bit risky, but I think you know me by now….I go after the pain once I know the solution!
So now, I wait for about 3 weeks, a.) relative to the chemo, need to take scans and see if the treatment has had any change on the cancer growth, if so, we do another week of pills, if not, not sure what out our next step will be, however as you know me I’m sure I will vote for another week of chemo pills, b) if I’m still suffering from arm/hand pain, the we will move toward a steroid shot.
So, I’m feeling quite good but do sleep a lot, especially on weekends, which I’m quite concerned about ( I’ll be talking to the Doctor as to why?)
I’m very encouraged hear of some you making the decision to change your “eating” lifestyle to the Hallaluhaj Diet. Remember take it easy, it will take time to adapt and don”t skip the carrot juice.
Your prayers are working so please don’t give-up, they mean so much to me and all that I still need to accomplish in my life including a great deal to enjoy with Julie which is the most important.
Thanks for your continued thoughts and prayers.
Ray & Julie
SUNDAY, OCTOBER 19, 2008 10:02 PM, EDT
I missed writing to you all!!. Between working and sleeping, I don’t seem to have much time left over.
I’m feeling good and have received some positive news this week. Finally got some news about my arm and wrist pain. The recent MRI on my spine didn’t turn up anything, incuding any new melanoma tumors, yeah!!
And the Oncologists said I could move forward with steriod shots for the spine and my arm, so away we will go. Seeing the Doctor Monday Oct 20th with hopes of starting this week.
That’s all for now. Will have more after our visit on Monday
Thank for all the hugs!!
Ray & Julie
THURSDAY, OCTOBER 02, 2008 09:39 PM, EDT
Just letting you know I’m feeling great and doing well after my brain radiation treatment last Friday.
Working full time and very excited about really digging in. Have many wonder projects underway.
Thought you would enjoy seeing my Halo ( helmet) I wore last week for my radiation. Just click the photos tab.
Have a great weekend. Ray
SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 28, 2008 12:29 PM, EDT
Well, I got thru it! The brain laser was the scariest thing I have gone through to date, partialy because of the unknown and partially because of the surgical procedure. Plus, they found 2 more tumors as result of the MRI they conducted in preparation for this procedure.Not sure if they were there before or not, but they were there now, so we ZAPPED them too.
It was long day on Friday ( lots of waiting, etc.) and Saturday we spent recuperating. I had some pretty heavy medication and I was “out of my head” for quite some time. I was saying and doing things things that were pretty bazarre!! Julie will have to share that story with you.
All in all, it went well except for one incident. As they were removing the screw from the over my left eye they noticed it was much larger than the hole left behind by the other screw. There were some tense moments of concern, but they called several experts in and all felt I would be fine and thus far I have been.
Today I’m feeling pretty good, sitting outside on the patio enjoying the birds, blue sky and the wind ruffling through the trees.
Once again, many, many thanks for all your prayers and kind words. I’m convinced that it’s because of all of you and you connection to God that I have recovered so quickly from each of my treatments & procedures.
Thanks again for all your blessings
Ray
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 25, 2008 09:16 PM, EDT
Tomorrow we will do the stereotactic radiosurgery for the two brain tumors-right side above the ear-bluetooth? We feel positive about the results. We will start Temador around the 15th. It is a walk in the park,compared to the other treatments.It’s oral and taken at home. We really feel lifted and loved with all the messages and prayers. The Atlanta weather has been beautiful-50’s at nite and80’s during the day. Ray is enjoying feeding the bird,squirrels and chipmunks. We should be home around3:30 ,so we will send the pictures of Ray in the helmut. Love to all.Julie
WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 24, 2008 09:54 AM, EDT
Was reflecting this morning on what I’m facing over the next several weeks and I realized that I hadn’t written in my journal for a while.
My treatments over the last months haven’t done their job and have been cancelled and in fact my cancer has actually grown….to my brain and my spine. I’m faced with radiation treament this week and discussions in a few weeks about what we do next. Julie and I have been doing research on what really works and what doesn’t and what alternatives we might consider.
Over the next few weeks we will be looking to God for his direction and asking for all your prayers to help us see the right path we should be taking for the continued treatment of my cancer.
Ray
Something to think about………
“When you’re between a rock and hard place, remember Jesus is the rock”
TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 16, 2008 07:27 AM, EDT
I was praying for good news…unfortunately I didn’t get it. My results from the CT scan showed my cancer growing and of course you already know it’s spread to my spine and brain. So here we go….another challenge!
Seeing the brain radiologist this morning to talk through the procedure which is done on an out-patient basis. It’s a laser procedure as I’m in an MRI with a head brace attached to my head, that should be interesting.
My IL2 treatments have been cancelled because they didn’t work. Looking at some alternatives, however won’t be visiting my Oncologist for few weeks to discuss.
So I have a new fight which I plan on winning. just need to take a new path. Appreciate all your prayers and thoughts.
Ray
THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 11, 2008 09:24 PM, CDT
Haven’t written lately, becasue not too much has been going on, plus I have been knee deep in my regional co-op presentation and conference calls.
This is the week although, that I’am taking tests to see how well the treatments have done. Thus far, my brain MRI has turned up 2 liesons, very small, however still there. So, my next treatment ( next week) has been postponed so I can go through a special process to elimanate these 2 liesons.From what I have been told it’s a radiation laser, fairly simple and painless. We shall see.
So, I’ll update everyone after I hear about my tests today. Have been told, the Doctor will call us on Friday, if not I won’t know more till Monday.
Keep the prayers coming.
TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 02, 2008 07:46 AM, EDT
My friends in the coastal region have been in my prayers all weelkend. Been glued to Fox News listening to every detail while working on my co-op presentations.So glad it was’t as bad as thought. Julie and I also have family in Louisiana, so the storm is particular important to us.
Other than a little fatique, I’m feling pretty good relavent to my cancer, but shoulder and arm are another issue. Lot’s of pain, but I have an appointment next Monday, so I’ll at least have some options as to what my next step is.
Many of you are asking how I’m doing on my diet at home as well as on the road. Well, the road isn’t something I have seen in 10 weeks, so I don’t know about that yet. But at home, I follow it exactly as we were instructed at the Hallalujah Wellness Center. Anita/Tim, you woud be proud! Trust me, it’s easy to do, especially after you realize how great you feel.
I sure hope some of you are trying it.
Let’s all keep our friends in the coastal states as well as along Florida, Georgia and the Carolina’s in our prayers as they recover and prepare from the storms.
Ray
SATURDAY, AUGUST 30, 2008 10:50 AM, EDT
What a great couple of day’s I have had! Thursday I awoke early to a beautiful morning, so I took my mile and half walk, only 5 days after leaving the hospital. It took me 10 days to accomplish the same thing after my first treatment.
Then I headed off to a day of meetings, my first in two months. WOW, it was geat getting back in the saddle. Met with Stacie Day & Stacey Gilbraith regarding our sales summit planning and then SalesForce.com for a CRM system for lead mgmt. At the end of the day I was still going strong and feeling great.
On Friday, made some great progress on several projects which was very gratifying.
Finally found a doctor for spine so I have an appointment Sept 8th.
Going to enjoy my weekend while finishing several projects. Hope you all are enjoying yours too. Will keep all of you in our prayers who are in the path of Gustav scheudled to hit the gulf coast on Monday.
Thanks again for all your prayers. Ray
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 27, 2008 07:10 PM, EDT
wednesday-where has the week gone? Ray is losing all the weight from the IL2,his only problem is the pinch nerve pain. Hope we figured out the right meds.His stranding in the stomach is getting better, so he is eating better. The phones were out for 2 days and internet for 1 afternoon-can’t complain about the rain. We are looking forward to a great weekend. Sorry I haven’t written, know you want to keep up with the happenings. Feel free to call him today-I’ll be at work. He is doing great,except his hand.Sure you won’t mind a few AHAHHAAH’S in the conversation-just kidding hope we are on the right meds now. Keep PUSHing.thanks for all the messages. Julie
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 27, 2008 01:11 PM, EDT
It’s been a while since I have written. As Julie mentioned last week, I had a very tough week in the hospital. It’s very hard for me to write while in the hospital.
Boy we do appreciate all your prayers, please don’t stop!
Right now I’m dealing with my arm pain, which brought me to tears last night! No matter how I laid in bed, or tried to sleep in a chair, I could not get any relief, I just wanted to sleep. I finally yelled out to God asking for relief and just broke down crying.
My arm pain IS quite serious. I have confirmed that 6 vertebrea are fused in my neck which is where the nerves are pinched. Unless we figure this out, I will have this for a long time. I’m waiting for Doctor to call to day with advice on my next step. In the meantime, as Julie wrote, we hope we discovered the best pain medication to give me as much relief as possible. Stay tuned.
To answer a few questions from the guestbook;
Mark L; How much weight have I lost? Since I started the Hallalujah Diet-12 lbs / since mid-June-38 lbs
Joan E.; Where are we now? We’re now home, since Saturday afternoon, couldn’t wait to get home.
Thanks again for all your prayers.
Ray
FRIDAY, AUGUST 22, 2008 07:35 PM, GST
sorry.couldn’t get online yesterday-thurs. was another nite of no sleep-blood at 4am. Ray has stomach problems-every time he eats anything it starts. We tried to leave last nite at 8:00 pm ,but he was in alot of pain-we stayed. He had a great nite-lots of sleep,free from all IV’s. We will see what happens today. We are packed and ready to go. Ray ate cooked yeggies for two days when we first arrived-then it started. The food is horrible-worst than college. Really sad that people who need live good food in hospitals get just the opposite.The standard american diet-SAD! Plan to get him home and back on the Hallelujah diet- he felt and looked great.He has tried to write several times,but was unable to get on line on his laptop-he doesn’t like mine. We have an overcast day,hopefully we will get some rain from Fay. Have a great weekend everyone. Julie
THURSDAY, AUGUST 21, 2008 01:37 AM, GST
10:00 treatment went well,till2:00am when we went ‘in the toilet’-BP drops, fluid starts building up-Ray has gained 15 lbs.,and fatigue. One tends to get worried when the nurses start running around. Ray and I decided not to continue with any more treatments for this round. We feels his body is telling us-enough! Today we are resting and jucing and taking julie’s vodoo medicine. We are concentrating on recovery and discharge. We will have 3weeks of recovery,before the scans to restage. We believe it will be great news,since we have all these prayers from all around the world.Please feel free to call-calls are free-the only thing free in this 2400.00 room. Thats billed $,not aetna$. Visitors are also welcome, Ray loves house visitors-cause I have to clean house. Ray hopes to get on line a little later-still some stomach issues. Keep up the great work everyone is doing-it’s working! julie
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 20, 2008 08:33 AM, GST
Ray completed his 5th treatment today at 2:00pm. The same amount as last time. Most people are not able to do the same amt. or more than the first time. Side effects have kicked in-weight gain,loss of appetite and upset tummy. He did walk 4 laps in the hall. The kidneys are going up again,we are at 2.8-the doctor is here now. Waiting to hear what we will do at 10pm. Official word- WE ARE a GO! This might be the last- the kidneys decide in the am. Hopefully we will get some sleep tonight. We didn’t get our nap in today. James came after work and brought distilled water from home- yes we distill our water. Ray doesn’t like the bottled water now. Visitors are welcome! Ray wasn’t able to get on line, till James arrived. Thanks for all the PUSHing. It works! So great to have all the wonderful support.JUlie
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 20, 2008 03:07 AM, GST
We are out of the toilet! We made the 10pm treatment without side effects, the kidneys even are down this am. Yea! Ray is snoring,thank you Brenda for the sleep kit -the ear plugs are great to block out the constant clicking of the iv machine and the mask also helps with the constant activity.love the lavender spray. Just wanted to give you some good news! Looks like we will go again at 6am. We wanted you to know what all the prayer and positive ‘go get em ‘ messages can do. UPPS-Ray now knows the internet is working-BEWARE! Love,Julie
TUESDAY, AUGUST 19, 2008 06:25 PM, GST
As they say in the movies ‘We are in the toilet’. The kidneys are saying no- way. Ray did two laps on the hall, just wants to sleep. They are flushing the kidneys now, we got blood today and dopamine.Waiting for the 5pm test results-earlier the kidneys were back up to 2.0. will keep you posted-we had to change rooms-the heart monitor wasn’t picking up in the other room. now we are in 714. Julie
SUNDAY, AUGUST 17, 2008 07:45 PM, CDT
We just finished the first treatment,hoping all goes well.We are on the 7th floor and it is GREAT! Ray feels and looks great,still frustrated when he can’t get on line. His system is to use his blackberry and have me take the elevator to the ground floor,run outside and off go the emails.We got some strange looks as we checked in with our 25lbs. of carrots. We will be juicing all day. our phone#is 404-712-3708-call anytime.Thanks for all the well wishes and prayers. A sign in the hall says PUSH! P-pray,U-until,S-something,H-happens.Love, Julie
SUNDAY, AUGUST 17, 2008 02:47 PM, EDT
Part of our new Hallelujah Diet is exercise which has been hard for me since starting my treatments. Shortness of breath after only 5-8 minutes of walking. Well, on Staurday I walked the furthest I have in some time, a mile and half for 35 minutes!! Felt so good being outside and excersizing. Hope you’all are getting your daily excercise.
The other important ingredient is a daily dose of vitamin D, which has gotten allot of press lately. Sunshine is full of natural vitamin D and we all should get at least 30 minutes a day. Take time for yourself, regardless of what’s going on, I unfortunately didn’t, but I’m now!!
Julie and I spent a fun day at the health food store, reading labels and finding all sorts of new things. Has anyone tried ricemilk? I never have, but it’s great. Soaked and dried sunflower seeds are my new favorite snack food. Once I start traveling again, I’ll have to have Julie make me a few bags for the plane……I will never, never eat the snack foods they serve on airplanes again!
Monday will be the start of my second week of treatment. It will be a great week, I know what to expect and I feel so much better with the way I’m now eating. I know I will get through it all much easier and be better off when I get out, hopefully recovering much quicker.
Please keep us in your prayers, they mean so much to Julie and I. . We will also journal daily while were in the hospital.
Here’s wishing you all a great week.
Ray & Julie
FRIDAY, AUGUST 15, 2008 08:36 PM, EDT
What a beautiful day it was today here in Atlanta. The sun was shining, the sky so blue and I was almost pain free!!
Now, that we knew about the latest diagnosis, the Doctor was able to prescribe a much stronger pain killer and WOW did it do it’s job. Slept so well last night, had a productive day and actually used my left hand in typing emails and my presentation.
Deb….please send those recepies…we will try everything. If you haven’t tried “raw” dishes you should, there are some great one’s. Send to my eMail.
Nancy / Tammy….thanks for sharing your impressions of our both at MPI…..I know Stacie would do a great job, I always count on her 110%.
Julie and I are planing on a fun weekend, watch a couple of funny movies and just spend time together before we go back in the hospital on Monday.
Thanks for all your prayers. You all give me the inspiration to keep fighting and never give-up! And believe me, I don’t plan to.
Love you all……..Ray
THURSDAY, AUGUST 14, 2008 05:53 PM, EDT
As I have mentioned, I have had severe pain in my arm the last several weeks. I was told by a Chiropractor it was 2 fused vertebrae, sqeezing a major nerve that goes down my arm. When my Oncologist heard this they ordered a spinal MRI, which I had yesterday.
Well, the results came back this afternoon…..I don;t have fused vertebrae. I have a melanoma tumor on my spine, so it has spread further than my lungs.
So, I’m going on a stronger pain killer to get some relief.
At this moment, it appears the treatment I’m taking ( IL2), will also address this new tumor.
So, on the bright side I don’t have another medical problem to deal with while taking my cancer treatment.
Thanks for your continued prayers.
Ray
TUESDAY, AUGUST 12, 2008 12:51 PM, EDT
A quick update on my treatments this week. I was scheduled for my second round however after all the pre-tests I must take, my Doctor felt my kidney’s were not strong enough to withstand another series of treatments.
So, I’m home for another week.I’m resting (last night 13 hours of sleep!!), however it’s going to give me a solid week to concentrate on my regional co-op presentations. Just to make you a little jealous, I’m working on my porch listening to the birds while I type away!!
It’s also giving us a full week of adapting to our new way of eating, establishing proper habits, organizing the kitchen and learning new receipes. I must say I feel real good eating just vegetarian. I also haven’t had a cup of coffee for 13 days!! Starbucks might have to close a few more stores to make up for my revenue lost!!
Thanks again for your kind words and thoughts and prayers, I ALWAYS look forward to reading all your notes.
SATURDAY, AUGUST 09, 2008 08:25 PM, EDT
What a week it has been!! We have been at the Hallelujah Acres Lifestyle Center in the North Carolina mountains.Our host’s Tim & Anita Koch walked us through the virtues of the Hallelujah Diet. Based upon the biblical principals of a healthy diet from the garden, exercise, water, rest and trust in the lord, we can enhance the natural healing power of our bodies.The goal; to establish life-long healthy eating habits by preparing creative great tasting foods and fresh juices.
So Julie and I are officially vegans, eating an 85% raw diest and 15% cooked. All vegetables and fruits. We’re both still detoxing, but feel real good and losing weight while on the retreat.
I know many of your have asked about the program since I mentioned it last, so here is their web site, Julie and I highly recommend it.
Wellness center we attended; http://lakelure.halifestylecenter.com
For the over-all ministry;www.hallelujahacres.com
We return to the hospital this Monday to start our next week of treatment. There is a possibility the Doctor may delay for a week because of my kidney’s. I did have acute kidney failure so they were stressed. We shall see.
Thanks for everyone’s cards and well wishes
MONDAY, AUGUST 04, 2008 09:50 PM, EDT
My apologies for not giving everyone an update since Thursday. The reason; my recovery since arriving home from the hospital has not been good. I’m expereincing all the sdie effects they controlled in the hospital with drugs. Also, had to see my Kidney specialist…found out I had acute kidney failure while I was in the hospital. Been fighting with my creatin levels and blood pressure to come down. I HAVE not felt like doing a THING!!
Plus I learned I have 2 fused vertebrae in my neck which has been sending the excruciating pain down my arm ALL the TIME.
Sunday we drove all day to a wellness center for the weeks exploring alternate healing meathods and I think we might have found it. I better way than those treatments putting all those poisons in my body. Joan, you need to check this out!!( also, thanks for the chicken soup and bread…wonderfull).
So, needless to say, this has been my first time to write in my journal.
I will give an update in a few days….learning so uch about how we all eat so poorly. Jennifer F. you will be proud of what I’m doing
Again, thanks for your thoughts and prayers
THURSDAY, JULY 31, 2008 01:38 PM, EDT
Thanks for all your entries in my journal. Especially the suggestions on where to be looking for alternative treaments.
while we’re exploring the more standard treatments offered by the medical field, Julie and I have decided to pursue a more holistic approach at the same time as my cancer treaments….. a holistic life style change, focusing on the physical, emotional ,spiriltual and healthy eating habits that can help repair that which we have done to ourselves as well fight off cancer.
I know you’al are telling me to take to easy and belive it or not, I’m…I HAVE to. You just don’t bounce back from this stuff that easily and as I take another round of treatments, my fatigue will only get worse, the muscle pain worse etc. I do have do still have work to be done( i.e. preparing for the regional co-op meetings), however I have many people stepping in helping out.
Well, as I have been writing, Emory hospital has called to have an MRI of my spinal cord tomorrow. Seems as though some information I provided earlier today about 2 compressed vertebrae with arthritus causing pain from my neck to my wrist my have some addional significance.
So, that’s all for now. will write again tomorrow, but probably not till late
WEDNESDAY, JULY 30, 2008 09:38 AM, EDT
It’s Wednesday and I’m HOME!!! Never thought they would release me. In the morning, I was going home, in afternoon I wasn’t. Finally at 7pm, Doc said ok. Julie was never so happy to get home!!
My kidneys really took a beating during the treatment and were definitely in charge. As I was waiting for my creatine count to come down, my blood pressure was going up, so needless to say, Julie was getting a bit concerned, however it is just one of the side effects.
So now that I’m home, I need to rest ( & work), and excercise preparing for my next step. So what’s next?
August 11th / return to the hospital for another week of treatment.
August 18-31 / return home to rest.
Sept 2-5 / tests to determine the impact the treatments have had on my cancer…..then decision time…..do we continue or go another direction.
Julie and I are already looking at other options so we can make an informed decision. Please share your experiences of various approaches your loved ones have taken with their cancer treatment options, I sure would appreciate knowing as much as I can.
Want to thank everyone for your continous thoughts and prayers, I look forward to reading them everyday.
TUESDAY, JULY 29, 2008 10:52 AM, EDT
It’s Tuesday in Sunny HOT Atlanta!! And we’re still HERE!!
I’m finally free of my IV pole so Julie has no place to play.
For all you lazy bums out there that don’t excercise, just wanted you to know I took 1st Place in the 5 Lap “6th Floor Hallway Challenge”.
Then Julie & I took stroll to Starbucks for a Latte
Last evening James stopped by with gifts…an “Areo” self-inflatable cushion bed for his MOTHER!! And a fan for me.He said if we get out today, we will have steaks on the grill……boy I cant’ wait. He has become a great Grill Master
This Afternoon’s Activities
The Hospital team says if it doesn’t rain, they plan on opening the roof for sun bathing and a picnic. We might do that.
If it does rain, the only activity that appeals to Julie and I is creating balloon animals out of exam gloves
Now for a Medical Update
Seems like my kidneys are still the culprit.The creatine levels are still high, coming down, but still high. They were as high as 6.3 on Sunday and need to be back down in the 2.0-2.9 range before they let me go home. It looks good for today, but were still waiting.
There so many things my Doctor has to consider as he brings my organs back into balance……he is so good and patient. As much as he knows I would love to be going home, he never over promises, tells like it is…”maybe, OR ‘looks good you might be going home tomorrow” …….and I’m ok with that. Having confidence in your Doctor is key when you’re going through something as serious as this treatment.
Just want you all to know I’m feeling better and stronger every day and looking forward to getting home
Ray
MONDAY, JULY 28, 2008 06:52 PM, EDT
Sorry, I haven’t been online for the last few days. Number of challenges, including;
* Not being able to get online.
* Sleeping all the time….would be awake for 10 minutes, then back to sleep.
* No energy
Once again, I apoloize for the site not being updated.
Yes, when Julie made the last enrty, I was doing better, I believe that was Sunday evening. It had been long day, not starting out very well, but improving as the day progressed.
Julie and I have been collecting our thoughts on our hospital visit.
I’ll be back. Not feeling well
SUNDAY, JULY 27, 2008 02:57 PM, CDT
RAY IS ON THE MEND. STARTED EATING- I TRIED EVERYTHING-FRENCH FRIES WERE THE SECRET.STILL VERY TIRED,BUT A GOOD CHANCE WE COULD LEAVE TOMORROW. CAN ANYONE TELL I WAS FRUSTRATED THIS AM AS THE NUMBERS KEPT GOING UP! SORRY! I EXPECT THE KIDNEY NUMBERS TO START DROPING FAST-ALONG WITH THE WEIGHT.THE DOCTOR JUST LEFT-DR LAWSON IS WONDERFUL. JULIE
SUNDAY, JULY 27, 2008 07:35 AM, EDT
the journey begins with a great doctor-lawson,recommended by md anderson-extremely devoted-here at all hours- always on call.we are greatful for him.this is our second go at melanoma with him.then there is emory hospital-the shinging star of atlanta-just found out they are 48th out of 50 top cancer centers. arrived with great hope on monday-saw the doctor and all was a go.first stop in the hospital was radiology-for a triple lumina (sp?] allows all the drugs and blood draws to go thru it -no needle-yea! after 3-4 hours we are on our way to our room-hoping for the 7th floor but we end up on the 6th. Our first nurse nice and starts hooking up ray.she tell us little about the treatment but everything else she knows-at times she act as if she is calling the shots. i asked if a nurse can do things on her own and was told no.we learned alot about her-her focus was always on what was we were doing, watching on listening to.we were a little bothered by the lack of focus on what she was doing medically.she was always put out when i asked questions. monday nite ray got out of bed and the triple lumina fell to the ground-the stitched part was still attached-he calmly picked it up and waited for me to return-i called the nurse.she came she saw,she ran out, she came back and told us no air got in his lungs-then took the stitches out. she assuredus she would be here early and get ray down to radiology to do it again. so we missed the first treatment at 10:00pm-even though she wanted to go ahead using the iv in his arm- the doctor said no. tuesday we were ready to go early- hoping to make the 6am treatment that she told us we could. 9am no news ,checking at the desk,weare told the order is in and they are waiting on radiology-our nurse appears to inform us that radiology has a full schedule and we have to wait.i go to th radiology dept and they tell me that they weren’t told it fell out and he will be picked up at 12:00.now we missed the 6am treatment and were going to miss the 2pm also.two day in and no treatments. at 1:00 still waiting i talk a walk down the administration hall- half way down i find an open door. I am at julie’s desk-said i would like to speak with someone about patient care,but not the patient advocate because she never responded the last two times i called her. julie call that person-so i try again with her,she listens-i make the pt. that we need to start treatment,she will get back to me -I have never heard back from her.emory finest! ray is finlly picked up at 2:30. he finally goes in at 3:15 and wait 15 minutes for the lead doctor to show up.another day that he has had nothing to eat till 4pm. the nursesin the radiology unit are great.they arejust caught in the middle of lost labs,no rooms for patients and the patient scheduling.Kit was wonderful.finally make the 10:00 treatment and the journey continues-hoping we will see the light at the end of the tunnel-opps it’s a train. more later out of time and have kept you long enough.julie
SATURDAY, JULY 26, 2008 09:08 PM, EDT
Our last treatment was Thursday at 3:30pm. We have ended the treatments for this session due to blood pressure and kidney concerns. Waiting for normal organ function to return. Ray is resting well, and loves reading all his cards and well wishes. We hope to be home by Monday or Tuesday. -Julie
THURSDAY, JULY 24, 2008 12:33 PM, EDT
Well, we’re back on track. My blood pressure is back up, kidney’s are working and other vitals ( that I won’t mention) are heading in the right direction.
So were back on tract for my 2pm treatment.Yeah!!!!!
Anne/Joan / Danielle-received your package….very special, playing the music now. You selected great artists…all young good looking cowboys!! And, Anne, sharing all your tunes from your personal iPod song selection was very special, don’t know how I could ever repay you!!!
Mike Tilley…thanks for touching base through my site and please let me know where you ended up
Mark Ladd…all the CP DOSs were sent this link, however should there be someone you feel would enjoy this site, by all means please pass it along
Tina… we should be leaving the hospital on Sunday and Julie is staying right here in my room
THURSDAY, JULY 24, 2008 06:18 AM, EDT
Thursday am-completed treatment 4-no side effects-good nite-hospital sleep-vitals every 4 hours. We will skip the 6am treatment-the kidneys are saying”we don’t like this stuff.” BP is low-side effects of the drug.Ray still feels good and has had a cup of coffee,will keep you posted.Since there are no adult movies,I have to practice my IV pole dancing. Ray’s goal today is to talk to his kidneys.Ray is really enjoying all the prayers and well wishes-keep them coming-we do feel the love! We will be playing the C&W music all day.Fondly,Julie
WEDNESDAY, JULY 23, 2008 12:17 PM, CDT
It’s Wednesday morning and I have completed 2 treatments and I actually feel fantastic……I had some of the side effects, however they have good drugs here!! Food has been good, just trying to have them adjust the items to be more diabetic.
Usually, about 4 hours after my treatment, I feel pretty good, have slept very well, but I do doze off during the day, so haven;t read too much. Julie is working on her needle point, visiting with other patients spouses who have something similar that I have, keeps her socially connected.
That’s about all for now. Another treatment in 1 hour, so they will be in & out geting me ready.Thanks for all you thoughts and prayers
TUESDAY, JULY 22, 2008 09:27 PM, EDT
Well, I’m back online……as some of you have experienced….receiving some of my emails earlier this evening. Spoke to Joan earlier this evening and she volunteered to give you all an update. Please see my guestbook for the update Joan provided. Thanks Joan for your assistance.
It HAS been an experienced thisn last two days, but were on our way…in 30 minutes it all starts!!
Thanks again for all your thoughts and prayers, Julie told me she felt the weight of the world lifted form her shoulders this morning, so she knew the prayers were working……so THANK YOU.
SUNDAY, JULY 20, 2008 07:00 PM, EDT
It’s sunday evening and I’m still trying to get it all togther, been hard to get motivated today. I’ve packed, but not quite like I normally do for a week on the road. Looking over a few magazines to take along, but I’m not even sure I’ll be able to read.
Continue to read the wonderful entries in my guestbook….thank you to everyone for your best wishes, thoughts and prayers. I’m on so many prayer lists, God is going to start asking questions about who this guy, Ray Shepard is!! Just kidding, he has answered many of my prayers over the years, so I know he knows who I’m.
Joel Osteen says God has a long term plan for each of us, we simply have to believe in what’s around the next corner and ask for his favor in leading us down the right road. So far, he has shown his favor for 55 years. I’ll be asking for his “favor”, another miracle and another 30 years to enjoy what he has in my plan. I’m looking forward to it.
Monday will be a long day, seeing Doctor’s, taking final tests, then waiting all afternoon to be assigend a hospital room. My first treatment will be at 10pm Monday evening……….the journey is about to begin, I’m glad you’re all long for the ride!!
SATURDAY, JULY 19, 2008 10:03 AM, EDT
I lay awake this morning thinking about all I have in front of me. However I kept going back to all the wonderful and kind words I keep reading from so many wonderful people in my life. You have no idea how much it means to me to read the uplifting words and encouragment from all of you. Believe me, I have allot to fight for, but the biggest reason I have is to spend many, mnay more years with my wonderful Julie and to see my grand children( which my boys tell me is many years in the future!). We’re planning on spending a quiet weekend, taking in a movie and doing a few small chores.
Ray
THURSDAY, JULY 17, 2008 04:40 PM, EDT
The Doctor’s office just called and said all my tests came out fine and I’m strong enough to go forward with my treatment, so Next Monday is the day, July 21st.
Now, it’s becoming a little more real, that’s it’s really going to happen!
WEDNESDAY, JULY 16, 2008 02:37 PM, CDT
Well, it’s been a waiting game. Wait for appointments t be scheduled, wait for the results. In preparation for the treatment it’s been necessary to take various tests to ensure my heart, lungs and kidney can with-take the exreme pressure wich will be placed upon them during the treament. I was due to go in July 14th, however we couldn;t complete all the tests in time, so we’re moved back to July 21st, that’s a definite.
I want to thank Joan Eisensdodt for introducing me to this site. It has beeen a great place to share feelings and thoughts and to hear from all my friends.Thanks Joan.
Been excerising and working, trying to get things in order for the week I’ll be out-of-touch.
Thanks to all those who have written in my guestbook. I really enjoy reading.
I will probably update my journal Friday or Staurday. Thanks to everyone for being there for me!
WEDNESDAY, JULY 09, 2008 10:34 AM, EDT
Just completed my biopsy to verify the fact that what is in my lungs is in fact melanoma. Everything went well.Still waiting for appointments to prepare for the treatment. The biopsy is important to ensure that the treatment prescribed is the correct one. Results are not expected for several days.
So right now, its a waiting game. Working hard on the many projects that I need to have in order while I’m in the hospital. Also, getting Stacie ready for the many shows and events she will be heading up in my absence.
I’m feeling well, except for my carpel tunnel.
That’s all for now. Will update in a few more days
SUNDAY, JULY 06, 2008 12:44 PM, EDT
It’s been 8 days since learning of my melanoma cancer returning. It was 5 minutes before we were leaving on a much needed vacation when the Doctor called and asked if we could come right over, they would unlock the doors when we arrived( it was 6;10pm). Not a good sign.
At first, I took it pretty well, knowing it was possile at anytime. but eventually, it got the best of me and my emotions began to bubble over when I thought of the possible consequences. I wasn;t ready to leave this world and I wanted to spend allot more time with Julie!!
Julie and I talked and we both knew we were there for each other no matter what happens.
We enjoyed the next few days we had before Monday when the phone lines were burning up learning more what was in front of us and trying to set appointments, more tests, etc
The visit with my oncologist went well learning more about what I was in for with the recommended treatment. Not a pretty picure; one week in the hospital receiving treatments 3 x per day, then home for 2 weeks. Side effects are pretty rough I’m told.
This coming week will be tested for several things and then July 14th, my first week of treatments will begin.